Crazy Lust
My fellow readers, I have neglected this blog for too long and I have now found the time to pick up my keyboard again and start telling more tails from the VIP room.
One story that I reflected on with much displeasure in my past was a story of love, well more like a story of lust. As you readers may know, I was in a six month relationship with a lovely brunette named Lindsay and I vowed to stay single after her departure. Well, that didn’t work out too well. This story starts like so many others, and ends, like so many others.
I was club hopping with some buddies on a Friday night and looking for a date for the evening. The night went well with pitchers of beers and a serious buzz. I was striking out and was feeling the seventh inning stretch. Last call was called and I starting chatting up a girl at the bar. I have no idea what I said since I was so drunk, but it apparently worked and I ended up going back to her place for a few hours of steamy nookie. She gave me her number and I left for home. A week later, I found the number and wondered who the fuck “Heather” was, so, I called. Big mistake! As soon as she picked up the phone I remembered who it was and I immediately wanted to get off the phone, yet she started to chat me up and we ended up going out to a movie and then, back to her place. You know how you don’t want to be mean and blow someone off? Well that was me and I caved big time. The only thing was, well, I was sober and this girl didn’t sit right with me. I made an excuse as to why I couldn’t spend the night and I booked it as soon as I could. I tossed out the number so I would never be so stupid to call it again.
Then, all the fun began.
It turns out that this girl was friends with a guy who knows a girl who knew a guy who was friends with someone’s third cousin who knew me. So she got my address and telephone number (she didn’t have call display as per why she never called before). So, I hadn’t talked to her in over a month and one day out of the blue, this girl calls me and asks why I had been ducking her. She goes on to tell me she went to the club looking for me and even went to my employer (the other club) and she wanted to know why I was such an asshole and why I use women. This caught me quite as a surprise and I just told her I didn’t really feel a connection and blah blah blah. Well she hung up on me, and then started calling me twice an hour for the rest of the day. I just stopped answering the phone. Two calls and hour tuned out to be 5, then 10, then 20. I didn’t use my phone for a few days. Finally I went out my back door to my parking lot the find the word “Bitch” painted on my hood and my tires slashed.
Funny huh? We’re just beginning.
The calls died down but I would mostly get calls on a Friday or Saturday night around 3am, I would answer and the person would hang up. I thought it was all over. Then one day, I came home to find her talking to my roommate. Yeah, she was sitting there on the couch talking to my fucking roommate. I took my roomy aside and asked why the heck this crazy bitch was here and he told me that he thought we were dating and it was all cool. Well I told her to leave and naturally she freaked out and locked herself in my bathroom. After about an hour I got pissed off and kicked my bathroom door open and her reply was to rip my bathroom sink off the wall. I have no idea how the hell she did it.
I used physical force to toss her out then called to police in fear of my tires getting slashed again. She was arrested and whisked away and three days later, my tires were slashed again. I promptly packed up and found another apartment. I guess it was safe to say I would be single for a while.
To this day, whenever I am in that town, I keep my eyes to the ground in fear of what I may see.
One story that I reflected on with much displeasure in my past was a story of love, well more like a story of lust. As you readers may know, I was in a six month relationship with a lovely brunette named Lindsay and I vowed to stay single after her departure. Well, that didn’t work out too well. This story starts like so many others, and ends, like so many others.
I was club hopping with some buddies on a Friday night and looking for a date for the evening. The night went well with pitchers of beers and a serious buzz. I was striking out and was feeling the seventh inning stretch. Last call was called and I starting chatting up a girl at the bar. I have no idea what I said since I was so drunk, but it apparently worked and I ended up going back to her place for a few hours of steamy nookie. She gave me her number and I left for home. A week later, I found the number and wondered who the fuck “Heather” was, so, I called. Big mistake! As soon as she picked up the phone I remembered who it was and I immediately wanted to get off the phone, yet she started to chat me up and we ended up going out to a movie and then, back to her place. You know how you don’t want to be mean and blow someone off? Well that was me and I caved big time. The only thing was, well, I was sober and this girl didn’t sit right with me. I made an excuse as to why I couldn’t spend the night and I booked it as soon as I could. I tossed out the number so I would never be so stupid to call it again.
Then, all the fun began.
It turns out that this girl was friends with a guy who knows a girl who knew a guy who was friends with someone’s third cousin who knew me. So she got my address and telephone number (she didn’t have call display as per why she never called before). So, I hadn’t talked to her in over a month and one day out of the blue, this girl calls me and asks why I had been ducking her. She goes on to tell me she went to the club looking for me and even went to my employer (the other club) and she wanted to know why I was such an asshole and why I use women. This caught me quite as a surprise and I just told her I didn’t really feel a connection and blah blah blah. Well she hung up on me, and then started calling me twice an hour for the rest of the day. I just stopped answering the phone. Two calls and hour tuned out to be 5, then 10, then 20. I didn’t use my phone for a few days. Finally I went out my back door to my parking lot the find the word “Bitch” painted on my hood and my tires slashed.
Funny huh? We’re just beginning.
The calls died down but I would mostly get calls on a Friday or Saturday night around 3am, I would answer and the person would hang up. I thought it was all over. Then one day, I came home to find her talking to my roommate. Yeah, she was sitting there on the couch talking to my fucking roommate. I took my roomy aside and asked why the heck this crazy bitch was here and he told me that he thought we were dating and it was all cool. Well I told her to leave and naturally she freaked out and locked herself in my bathroom. After about an hour I got pissed off and kicked my bathroom door open and her reply was to rip my bathroom sink off the wall. I have no idea how the hell she did it.
I used physical force to toss her out then called to police in fear of my tires getting slashed again. She was arrested and whisked away and three days later, my tires were slashed again. I promptly packed up and found another apartment. I guess it was safe to say I would be single for a while.
To this day, whenever I am in that town, I keep my eyes to the ground in fear of what I may see.
posted by Tavis Xavier at
1:12 PM
3 Comments:
this is some of the funniest shit I've read in a while.
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This is entertaining and funny as well. Thanks for sharing the article.
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